Book Review and Giveaway: Make Your Worrier a Warrior by Dan Peters, PhD

Raising Asperger's Kids:  Dealing with your fear of fear. That is how I always describe the boys' need to worry. Of course the doctors call it generalized anxiety disorder or even the anxiety that goes hand in glove with autism. This drive that something is never perfect or that something in our life is wrong or could be better if only...if only, but you don't know what that only is. The  catastrophizing about your reality. Worrying that the most awful things will happen, even if there are no realistic basis for the worry. Allowing this worry to prevent you from having a happy and enjoyable life.

Anxiety is the monster that attacks us in our brains and in our every waking hour It is the monster that hides in the recesses of our  minds and prevents us from living life. As parents it is hard to watch your child deal with anxiety. It is hard to not know how to help them. It is hard to not understand what is going on inside their head. Anxiety is a complex pattern of thoughts and ideas that just seem, seem seem to be on the otherside of a divide that we cannot get ahold of.

Well here comes some help. Dr. Peters breaks everything down for us in a matter of fact way that makes it very understandable in his book Make Your Worrier a Warrior: A Guide to Conquering Your Child's Fears.  He teaches us the basics and gives us useable information on how to help our children and even ourselves. He breaks down the types of fears and anxiety you might encounter and then goes about telling you how to handle them. He gives you practical advice. He also acknowledges that debilitating anxiety isn't something that just happens in a vacuum. That dealing with anxiety you may also have to deal with other mental health or learning disabilities as well. He talks about a convergence of ideas that incorporates all aspects of your child. He discusses how to get your child's (or even your) village on board with a treatment plan. (As anyone who reads this blog knows, I am a big fan of the concept of "village" to help your child. You cannot do this alone and neither should you have to. It is NOT a matter of weakness, but of understanding that at times you do and are entitled to seek help for yourself and/or your child.)

What is equally important is that Dr. Peters, unlike many other authors,  doesn't stop with the parents. He writes a companion book for children, From Worrier to Warrior.  Using the same methodology that he does in the parent's book, he tells children about the "worry monster" and what it means. He explains through vignettes how there are other children who feel like they do. In the end he gives your child advice and understanding on how to help themselves.  Of course if you do buy these companion books for younger children you would simply want to pick out the applicable stories to your child and their situation. In fact, I would say reading the stories together goes along way in helping and supporting your child.

Note: This book is not really for younger elementary school children. It is definitely too much information for a young child to process. The book is also for independent learners. Even if your child is a tween or adolescent, it is not a bad thing to read it together if that is what it takes for them to synthesize the information.

Actually remember that these two books are meant to be read together. I would say its akin to a family therapy session. I would coordinate the chapters in the two books so that after each one is read you could sit down with your child and help them process what they have just learned. Discussions could also be helpful for you to see just how your child views themselves in relationship to their worry monster. My personal opinion is that these books are helpful for any family dealing with anxiety issues. It is definitely a good place to start.
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Here's something new and fun for me:  in conjunction with Mother's Day, which here in the USA, is May 11, I will be doing a giveaway of these companion books. Please leave me a comment about what you think of the book review above along with your email address so I can contact you once a winner has been randomly chosen. The contest runs from today until May 1, since I would like to send the books out to the winner before Mother's Day.

There are several rules: (1) only ONE entry per person and; (2) since this is my first contest I am going to limit it to those people who live in the USA (sorry to my foreign readers); (3) If you are going to do a critique of my writing be kind, and (4) FYI the caveats. If the comment doesn't fit into the prescribed rules, it doesn't get published and you are not entered. Go to Raising Asperger’s Kids to comment and enter.

Good luck,

Elise

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Natural Remedies to Relieve Stress and Anxiety

Knoji:

It seems there is always something new that causes us more stress and anxiety. You can try these natural remedies to relieve your stress and anxiety.

Stress and anxiety can be very damaging to our mental and physical health and in today’s world there are all kinds of reasons for stress and anxiety.

In ancient times, when people were under stress it was either fight or flight. Our bodies are made up to change physically and mentally when under stress that causes us to think of fight or flight. Except in today’s world we usually cannot fight or flight, so we sit still while under stress which causes even more stress to build up. If that anxiety and stress continues for too long without resolve, you can actually have a nervous breakdown.

Stress can actually cause us to gain weight. It is now known that stress causes belly fat to accumulate. Stress causes our blood pressure to rise; neither of these health conditions are good for our health. It is important we find ways other than fight or flight to relieve stress, here are some natural remedies to relieve stress.

Exercise as a Natural Remedy to Relive Stress and Anxiety

Exercise is one of the best ways to relieve stress, as long as exercise is okay with your doctor.

• Going for a fast 30 minute walk can really relieve tension, anxiety and stress.
• Riding an exercise bike for 10 minutes or longer is great.
• Join an aerobics class and work up a sweat
• Yoga is great to relieve stress
• Tai chi, an ancient exercise is slow and very calming, it has been called moving meditation and can be done by anyone of any age.
• Get a punching bag, a great natural remedy to relive stress and anxiety.

For more specific stress relieving exercises read Ways of coping with stress

Limit Caffeine

Too much caffeine like coffee, pop, energy drinks and some teas can increase your stress level. It is odd, but many people actually drink more coffee when under pressure or stress which of course leads to more anxiety and stress.

If you were to eliminate caffeine from your daily diet, you would be surprised at how calm you will feel during the day, all day, even during stressful times. Many think they just cannot do without that morning, afternoon and evening cup of coffee.

Start by limiting yourself to a couple of cups in the morning only and no more for the rest of the day. And then try to quit drinking coffee and all other drinks that have caffeine in them.

Lavender for Stress and Anxiety Relief

The essential oil of lavender has been used for centuries for healing purposes. One of these health reasons is for its calming effects during times of stress and anxiety.

You can take a hot bath with the lavender oil added to the water, you can put a few drops of the lavender oil on your pillow which will help you sleep, have a lavender potpourri in your home and you can have a massage with it.

Bach Rescue Remedy

As with all natural remedies, they can work wonders for some people and not work at all for others. Rescue Remedy made by Bach Flower Remedies is one I have tried myself during times of anxiety and high stress and it actually did have a calming effect on me.

I tried the spray version and you just spray twice on your tongue and it could relieve your stress and calm you. You can find this natural remedy in your health food stores.

Eat a Light Diet

A simple natural remedy is to change your diet. Eating meals that are high in fat and or fried foods can cause the blood pressure to rise and increase stress during stressful times. Eating a lighter diet will help your digestion, keep your blood pressure from rising and possibly help you feel less stress.

A lighter diet means eating less and lighter foods like more vegetables and legumes in place of a large serving of meat or fried foods.

Meditation and Breathing

Learn to meditate. It is not hard to learn and with practice, meditation is a great way to relieve stress. Learning deep breathing techniques can also relieve stress.

Vitamin B Complex Relieves Stress

A good multivitamin that has plenty of the B vitamins or just a B complex vitamin every day is very good for the nerves and can relieve stress and anxiety. If your diet is lacking in some or all of the B vitamins, that could be one reason you have so much anxiety or stress.

Talk Therapy

Talk therapy can really help reduce negative thinking which turns into worrisome thoughts which almost always causes undue stress. There are three types of talk therapy; cognitive, behavioral and interpersonal. To relieve stress, cognitive therapy should be the best. Talking with a trained professional can show you how to stop the negative thoughts and relive the stress. You can talk more freely with a talk therapist than you might with a friend or relative and it is much better than talking to yourself.

Valerian as a Natural Remedy to Relieve Stress

Valerian has been used for centuries to help with insomnia and relieve stress and anxiety. Germany’s E Commission has approved valerian as an effective sedative. In the United States, the Food and Drug Administration has categorized valerian as GRAS (generally regarded as safe).

Valerian is a plant and the root of this plant is what is used for the natural remedy. You can buy valerian in the form of a tincture, as a tea or in a powdered form in capsules. You can make your own tea by pouring 1 cup of boiling water over 1 teaspoon of dried valerian root and let that steep for 5 – 10 minutes. You can also buy commercially prepared valerian root tea bags at your local health food store.

In some people valerian actually has the opposite effect, causing more anxiety and restless, so be aware of this. Something else to be aware of, valerian does not smell very good, it doesn’t taste bad though.

There are possible drug interactions with valerian and you should not take valerian if you:

• Tricyclic depressants like Elavil
• Do not take valerian if you have had alcohol
• Barbiturates
• Xanax or Valium
• Anticonvulsants
• Any drug that is for insomnia like Ambien, Sonata, Lunesta or Rozerem
• Antihistamines
• Statin or other blood pressure lowering medicines
• Possibly some antifungal drugs

To be safe, you should ask your doctor about taking valerian if you are on any medications.

Conclusion

Stress and anxiety are becoming so common today that some might take it as a normal way to live, but you don’t have to. There are numerous natural remedies to relieve stress and anxiety and these remedies should be tried before turning to medications.

Copyright Sam Montana October 2, 2010

Resources

Valerian - University of Maryland Medical Center

Article photo by Maga-Chan

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